Episode 6
Roena simply replied with a small voice, ‘Yes,’ without any excuses or responses.
It would have been better if she had told me about the importance of Sir Halberd and made me realize that he was someone I could never have.
Then I would have found another way. I would have taken a step back and quietly crouched down. I would have lowered myself as if waiting for the right time and then sprinted full speed down that path, thinking that someday I would have him.
However, Roena didn’t say anything to me. Instead, she went to him with a pitiful expression and ‘asked’ him to serve me.
She trailed off her words, sobbed, and said to protect me, who is a better ‘lady’ than herself. She requested that since I am a precious existence to her, he treat me kindly as if thinking of her.
If she really intended to listen to my words, it would have been right to give an ‘order’ rather than a request.
But by making a request to Rustein Halberd, Roena gave him the opportunity to choose. It was an action she could do because she knew that Sir Halberd would not choose me.
And Rustein Halberd, who has free will, naturally did not comply with Roena’s ‘request.’ Instead, he came to me and spat out words close to a warning in his characteristic cool voice. It was a situation close to despair for me. What did he say to me?
‘From now on, the lady I will serve is only Miss Roena. Until this life ends. My sword exists to protect the Vishbalz family and Miss Roena.’
‘I am also a Wischwaltz. Why don’t you listen to Roena’s words?’
‘……The young lady only requested and did not give an order.’
‘Then if she orders, will you comply?’
‘Even if I break my sword, such a thing will not happen. So I hope we don’t meet again over such matters.’
His heart was firm. There was no me in his cold eyes. I felt a stinging pain in my back from his gaze. My breath was completely blocked by the first direct cold treatment I received since entering the Wischwaltz family. He, Ryustein Halberd, dislikes me.
Upon realizing this, I felt a shock as if the sky was collapsing.
Why? For what reason? Is asking for him such a wrong thing? What’s the big deal?
But no one answered. Mother and I were just idiots who knew nothing about the important matters needed for the family, merely the superficial family of the count’s house.
After that, the situation flowed obviously. Before I knew it, I had become the wicked older sister who childishly whined to Roena while defying my adoptive father’s authority, and Roena had become the pitiful younger sister who tried to fulfill such an rude request from her sister.
It was a natural sequence for people to point fingers at me and whisper.
‘She has no manners or refinement suitable for the count’s family, yet she wants to have Sir Halberd. Isn’t her dream really ambitious?’
‘Who would want to take on the protection of such a vulgar woman? Look, it’s been half a year since she entered the count’s family, and all she does is eat, sleep, buy dresses, and wear jewels—nothing but luxurious things. Just like her mother’s daughter.’
‘That’s right. I wonder if she even knows the word refinement. If she debuts in society like that, it will be a great disgrace to the count’s family. I don’t know if she even realizes her position. It’s really embarrassing.’
‘In comparison, Miss Roena is the epitome of an elegant lady. How beautiful and kind her grace is. Ah, I think I know why Sir Halberd is loyal to Miss Roena. Even the princess couldn’t compare to our young lady. I envy the others who serve her.’
‘But what is this for us? It’s so frustrating.’
When I heard their words, what I felt was shame rather than anger. Rather than being shocked by their tone calling me ‘vulgar,’ I felt humiliated by their act of contrasting me with Roena.
To me at that time, Roena was just a kind idiot. I thought the only difference between us was our innate status. But to think that Roena is superior to me, I couldn’t believe it at all.
At the same time, this thought also occurred. If I show a more outstanding appearance than Roena, will Sir Halberd look at me again?
Actually, I still don’t know well. When did I start liking him? Whether I clung to him almost obsessively and loved him.
I just naturally felt that I loved Sir Halberd from some point. Without realizing it, my heart was filled with the person named Ryustein Halberd.
Yes, there’s no such thing as a reason. Just standing in front of him makes my face red, my vision yellow, my legs tremble, and my breath short.
If his gaze accidentally touches me, I feel joyful as if I have the whole world. When he speaks to me in a reluctant situation, I feel happy enough to cry.
To me, Rustein Halberd was my entire life. So I wanted to have him. By any means.
However, the time given to me was cruel. I didn’t know how great a girl Roena, whom I only mocked as a purely foolish idiot, actually was.
Yes, it’s four and a half years. That time when I despaired and wailed over my own incompetence. The memories of the days when I lost self-esteem about myself. Sadness, anger, and despair. It’s the 54 months of time that created the monster who torments Roena Wischwaltz, Sisse Wischwaltz.
I slowly closed and opened my eyes. And I turned my gaze to look at the real Rustein Halberd. While grieving that my returned heart is still beating strongly toward him.
Why do I feel this heartbroken even though I know that you won’t look at me?
I gripped the handkerchief tightly. I moved my trembling lips and barely spoke.
“I thank you for your kindness, Sir. I will launder it later and return it to you.”
“It’s fine.”
His answer made me flinch for a moment, but I desperately put on a natural smile.
Ah, yes. You always refused everything I gave. Anything that my touch reaches. Because it’s not Roena.
You know, Sisse. So why are you so sad when there’s nothing more to be hurt by? You’re not the old you. So just pass by him pretending nothing happened.
I lifted my skirt hem and naturally curtsied to greet him.
“I hope you forget the earlier appearance. Please.”
Because I don’t want my name to come from your mouth. Fortunately, Sir Halberd nodded and granted my request. I let out a sigh of relief and passed by him.
I saw Sir Halberd moving his lips as if to say something to me like this, but I deliberately ignored it pretending not to know.
And when he was out of sight, I buried my nose in the handkerchief I was holding and shed tears. While deeply burying in my heart the scent of Sir Rustein Halberd and his kindness that I can never hope for again.
A moment later, I released the strength from my hand. The handkerchief was fluttering down, but I deliberately didn’t pick it up. Instead, I walked toward my room pretending to be calm as if nothing had happened. His scent lingered at the tip of my nose, but I acted ordinarily as if nothing was wrong.
Thanks to that, when I arrived at the room, I had returned to the cunning and wicked villainess as usual.
The kind of bad bitch who smiles mischievously at Marie, who is trembling all over and greeting me, as if she had already heard the rumors.
**
Right now, Marie must be not only quite confused but also feeling fear. Not only did she fail to properly mess with me, but she even got caught for her own misdeeds.
Moreover, since Margo was dragged to the adoptive father and scolded because of this incident, how scared must she be? Given the head maid’s personality, there’s no way she would leave her alone.
Perhaps she might be demoted to cleaning human waste of the count’s family members or doing menial tasks like boiling laundry under the tower in the basement. Or maybe even dirtier tasks. Margo is capable enough for that.
What’s certain is that Marie can no longer do the job of exclusively serving superiors. Wouldn’t she be branded as a maid who doesn’t even know the basic manual?
This is no different from saying she can no longer lead the comfortable life as before. The life of a menial maid and a maid dedicated to the young lady is worlds apart.
So that’s why she’s looking at me with such pitiful eyes. As if begging for forgiveness with her hands clasped. Ironically, in this situation, the only lifeline she can cling to is me.
I approached Marie with quick steps and pressed her head toward the floor. And I whispered to her, who let out a low scream.
“You still have a stiff neck as if you don’t know how to greet. How dare you stand so insolently when your master has come. Do I have to teach you everything from one to ten like this?”
“Ah, Miss, I was wrong.”
I smiled coldly and pushed her body back onto the floor. She loses balance and falls backward. A scream mixed with sobs was flowing out.
“Shh, be quiet.”
I said in a whisper.
“Otherwise, you don’t know where the tongue in your mouth will disappear to.”
Then Marie hurriedly nodded with her face smeared with tears. I clicked my tongue at her appearance.
“Poor Marie.”
“Yes, yes. Miss.”
“You seem to have heard the rumors. That’s why you’re trembling so pitifully? You seem pitiful. So what did you hear?”
“Uh, well…….”
“Why are you so afraid? It’s completely different from this morning. It’s not like you.”
I grabbed her lips with my fingers and pulled strongly. I smiled coldly while looking at Mari’s lips stretching out like a duck’s.
I didn’t care even if her face turned bright red from the pain. Instead, I asked in a light voice as if singing a song.
“Who told you this delightful news?”
I dare confess that the me before returning was different from other modest ladies in behavior and disposition.
Unlike them who hide themselves under the pretense of refinement, I didn’t fear inflicting corporal punishment on subordinates, and if necessary, I could exercise violence close to torture. Funnily, I had a natural talent in that area, so I was skilled at tormenting someone.
That’s why in the past, I used all kinds of torture methods to abuse Roena, but until the truth was revealed, no one knew that she was suffering physically. Because I inflicted wounds so cleverly. That’s why only I knew about the blue bruises hidden under the hem of her clothes.
So playing with a wench like Marie is nothing.
What should I do? At my whispering murmur, Marie shakes her head strongly and pleads with her eyes. Her lips, making a mumbling strange sound, contained sobs.
She probably realized that my words are not a simple threat. Perhaps she felt deep tension from the minor violence of twisting her lips mercilessly.
Is that why? Marie was rolling her big eyes and trembling like an aspen tree. Her face, turned pale, is full of fear toward me.
