Ch 2.2
On the tray were bread and soup that looked like a decent meal.
As Mary placed the food on the table, I pushed the bowl toward the child.
“Eat.”
At the command to eat, the child initially shot me a cautious glance, but as the aroma of the food drifted over, I saw him swallow hard.
“Eat up. Come on, let’s talk after you’ve eaten.”
I pressed a spoon into the child’s hand and gestured for him to eat quickly.
Then, the child began to hurriedly scoop up mouthfuls of soup.
Watching him eat, it seemed he was truly starving.
I told Mary to leave and quietly watched the child eat.
While he ate, the child occasionally checked my reaction, but perhaps because of a healthy appetite, he emptied the entire bowl in one go.
“Is it good?”
“……Yes.”
“Should I ask them to bring more food?”
“No. I’m okay…….”
“Don’t worry about what I think; eat as much as you want.”
“I’m fine. I’m full now.”
At the words that he was full, I fell silent.
And as I watched the child cleaning his mouth, I waited for him to speak first.
“When you saved me yesterday…….”
As if he had quickly read the look in my eyes, the child spoke quietly.
“When I asked why you bought me, Bel, you told me then. You said I had a look in my eyes that was pleading to be saved.”
Since it was true that I had said that, I nodded slightly.
“That’s right.”
“The moment Bel saved me, I made a vow
to myself. That I would serve Bel as my master for the rest of my life.”
“I didn’t save you for that reason.”
I thought I had spoken clearly enough for the child to understand, but he was being strangely stubborn.
“I’ve told you repeatedly, my intention from the start was to leave you in a safe place. I am not in a position to take you with me.”
“Please. You bought me. You saved me. I want to follow Bel.”
“Then what about the younger ones you lived with?”
“…….”
“Is it alright if you never see those children again? You said you lived together; if you go with me, you will never see them again. Are you still okay with that?”
“……It’s okay. Those kids will do well from now on. More than those children, I hate the thought of parting with Bel even more.”
The child drove the point home decisively.
While I was staring at the child in silence, lost for words, I heard William calling me from outside.
“My Lady, it is William.”
“Come in.”
William entered the room.
He gave the child a quick glance before fixing his gaze on me and bowing his head.
“So, what about that man?”
“I went to the inn from yesterday, but he was nowhere to be seen, as if he had already departed.”
“What?”
When I brought the child into the inn, I had ordered William to find Eden and bring him here.
I had planned to entrust the child to him again.
But since he was gone, there was a setback in the plan.
“Just in case, I searched the entire surrounding area thoroughly, but I couldn’t find him.”
“We definitely ran into him earlier. Did he leave the village so soon?”
“It seems he departed immediately.”
“Ah…… I see. You must be tired. Go on and rest.”
“Understood.”
After William left, I looked at the child, feeling at a loss for what to do.
‘By the way, I don’t even know where the orphanage is; I forgot to ask.’
Regret set in, but it was already too late.
I pondered for a moment about what to do with the child.
‘Should I leave him at an orphanage here?’
But perhaps sensing what I was thinking, a look of anxiety clouded the child’s face.
Then, suddenly, the child knelt down and began to cry.
“What are you doing?”
With a look of horror, I stood up and applied strength to try and pull the child up.
However, he was holding his ground on the floor with a stubborn strength that didn’t seem like a child’s.
“Get up. Hurry!”
“Bel, please don’t abandon me. Please?
Sob.”
“What—.”
“I’ll stay quiet and never be a bother. So please, don’t abandon me…….”
Not only was my thought discovered, but the child was crying because of it, so I looked at him with a troubled heart.
‘What should I do.’
For a moment, the child’s face overlapped with a version of myself from the past.
The past, where I had already been
abandoned once but lived in constant anxiety of being abandoned again—those desperate moments flashed through my
mind like a revolving lantern.
But even so, I couldn’t just take the child with me.
I hardened my heart and spoke.
“First, get up. Stand up and let’s talk calmly.”
However, the child had no intention of getting up at all.
So, I used all my strength to pull the child to his feet.
The child’s face was covered in tears.
‘I mustn’t let my heart waver.’
“I’m sorry. I really cannot take you with me. That is just how my situation is. So please, try to understand me.”
At my words, a look of despair instantly filled the child’s face.
“I’m sorry. Just sleep for today, and tomorrow I will look into an orphanage here for you.”
“…….”
With his head bowed, the child no longer responded to my words.
Since I was being firm, he seemed to have resigned himself.
I looked at the child with a pitiful expression before shaking my head to snap out of it.
“Well, sleep well and I’ll see you tomorrow.”
And I immediately left the child’s room and returned to my own.
However, even as I lay in bed to sleep, for some reason, sleep would not come easily.
The look in the child’s eyes as he watched me earlier would not leave my mind.
“Sigh…….”
A sigh escaped me.
It was because I knew exactly how the child felt.
You don’t know that despair unless you’ve experienced it.
The feeling of thinking you’ve caught a hand only to be cast aside—even though it was now something that had nothing to do with me, just remembering it made me
choke up with emotion.
Steeling my heart, I tried to list the reasons in my head why I couldn’t take the child.
But in the end, there wasn’t a single plausible reason.
It was just the excuse of being on a journey.
In fact, if you really looked at it, there was no reason I couldn’t take in a child even while traveling.
The Duke’s house had numerous servants and knights.
Assigning him one of the many tasks within the mansion seemed like it wouldn’t be a bad choice for the child either.
Thinking that way, I simply couldn’t stay still.
I sat up in bed and headed toward the child’s room.
Knock, knock.
I knocked on the door, but no sound came from inside.
“It’s me. Are you sleeping?”
The moment I spoke, the door opened from the inside and the child appeared.
As if he had been waiting for me.
“I came because I have something to say. May I come in?”
The child gave a small nod, and I entered the room.
After choosing my words internally for a moment, I looked at the child and spoke.
“Now that I think about it, I don’t think
there’s any reason I can’t take you with me.”
At those words, the child’s face instantly brightened as he realized what I meant.
“Even now, I still think you’d be better off in an orphanage, but if you want, I’ll take you. Do you really want to go with me?”
Unlike just a moment ago, the child nodded vigorously.
“Yes! I want to go with you!”
The child’s voice seemed to hold a determination that would not change.
“I’ll do anything. I’ll do whatever you tell me. No, I’ll do it well.”
“I see your will. Then, wouldn’t you like to become a knight?”
He could have worked as a servant, but seeing the strength I felt earlier, the child seemed to have the potential to become a knight.
“……A knight?”
“Yes. If you follow me, I’ll make sure you
become a knight. Conveniently, there is a teacher for you too.”
Thinking of William, I referred to him as a teacher of my own accord.
“Yes! I’ll become a knight. I’ll become a knight who protects Bel!”
A knight who protects me. A slight smile formed at the cute idea.
“And, until now, I haven’t said anything about you calling me by my name, but since you’ve decided to follow me, you shouldn’t call me so freely like that. From now on, call me My Lady.”
“Yes. I will do that, Lady Belita.”
Since this child now belonged to me, I was his master.
Therefore, I had to instruct him firmly from the start on things that others might find fault with.
“There will be plenty of things to learn from now on. You’ll have to learn how to ride a horse and undergo training to become a knight. Can you do it well?”
“I will learn diligently, My Lady.”
Since I told him to call me My Lady, he now attached “My Lady” to the end of every sentence.
“And…….”
Somehow, once I decided to take the child, everything happened in an instant.
“Do you still not remember anything?”
“Yes…….”
“Then you need a name.”
I couldn’t keep calling the child “you” or “hey.”
The child needed a name.
“What should we do? Is there a name you like?”
“Please give me one, My Lady.”
“Me?”
“Yes. Since My Lady took me in, it is only right that you also give me a name.”
That was also true.
I pondered for a moment on what name would be good, and a decent name flashed through my mind.
“Lian. Let’s call you Lian.”
“Lian…….”
The child repeated his newly given name to himself.
“Thank you, My Lady.”
The child, who would now be called Lian, gave a very radiant smile.
☆☆
