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IYAM – Ch 34

 

Chapter 34

 

 

“What is all this…?”

 

Agnes looked with weary eyes at the pile of firewood pouring in.

 

Bright red flames flickered like tongues, and sparks brightly illuminated the inside of the fireplace.

 

Thanks to that, the outside air was quite chilly, but the room was warm enough to suffocate.

 

A bit excessively so.

 

It wasn’t yet weather to light the fireplace.

 

When she asked the maid about the untimely commotion, the only reply was that it was Lionel’s order.

 

As both cheeks flushed red like peaches, Agnes needlessly cooled her face with the back of her hand.

 

The room air was cozy, but her heart instead grew uncomfortably heated.

 

‘I should have spoken more cautiously, I was hasty.’

 

How had she appeared to Lionel.

 

Like a vicious shrew trying to pin blame on her family out of spite just for being investigated a little?

 

‘But if not Lionel, no one could restrain Father and Sister.’

 

The master of the capital defense forces, Jerome Winterbolt.

 

From the situation in the investigation room earlier, he already seemed to be shielding Adrian.

 

If Adrian had overlooked a connection to Rebelt knowingly…

 

Worry preceded about how much more they might rampage in the capital ahead. So her heart had grown impatient.

 

Moreover, since Lionel had shown a reaction as if trusting her for the first time, her judgment had briefly clouded.

 

It wasn’t something to approach so complacently.

 

Agnes buried her face in both hands.

 

How could she make Lionel believe her words.

 

“Would that even be possible…?”

 

Lionel believing in her.

 

It was a wish that felt bitterly unrealistic.

 

Still, she couldn’t give up like this, so she planned to seek Lionel as soon as day broke.

 

Leaving the despondent Agnes, the maid who added another handful of firewood to the fireplace bowed.

 

“Then rest comfortably.”

 

“Ah, um…”

 

Agnes unconsciously reached out her hand.

 

From waking up and moving all day, she had eaten nothing for nearly two days.

 

Could she ask for food.

 

Checking the time, evening mealtime had long passed.

 

In the Bardo mansion, missing mealtime once meant simply going hungry as usual.

 

Forgetting how to open her mouth and ask for something probably started from then.

 

Grrrowl—.

 

Ironically, at that moment, her empty stomach rang embarrassingly.

 

Agnes’s earlobes burned hot.

 

“I’m sorry. I didn’t know you were hungry. I’ll immediately order food prepared.”

 

Fortunately, the maid didn’t laugh.

 

Agnes gathered a bit more courage.

 

“Could you perhaps bring the food to the bedroom? The new wheelchair is a bit uncomfortable…”

 

Originally, the guest room where Agnes stayed was on the first floor connected to the dining room used for meals.

 

Given the mansion’s size, even the same floor was quite a distance.

 

It wasn’t an easy distance to begin with, but with the wheelchair brought from the hospital, it was even less convenient.

 

Unlike the previous metal wheels, this wheelchair had wooden wheels, so they kept catching on the uneven floorboards.

 

Even coming to the room, there had been several close calls.

 

Fortunately, without needing lengthy explanations, the maid granted Agnes’s request.

 

“Then, I’ll prepare tonight’s dinner in the room.”

 

Soon after, a tray with food really entered the room.

 

Warm steam rose over the silver platter.

 

A stew and soup that seemed light on the stomach, along with a few pieces of soft bread, were neatly arranged.

 

Agnes needlessly glanced around.

 

Was it okay to receive such treatment.

 

It felt awkward, like sitting in a place not her own.

 

“…It must have been troublesome, thank you. I’ll eat well.”

 

Carefully lifting the spoon, only then did hunger and fatigue rush in at once.

 

It seemed her stomach would warm quickly with even one bite.

 

Yet suddenly, a presence was felt at the door.

 

Thinking it was a servant to take the empty tray, she turned her head, and Agnes’s eyes widened.

 

Lionel was walking in.

 

“Everyone leave.”

 

After glancing at the fireplace as if confirming something.

 

Lionel dismissed those around and sat in the opposite chair.

 

Elegantly crossing his long legs, he felt in his inner pocket.

 

The hand about to take out a cigarillo as habitual suddenly stopped.

 

Because of the prickling gaze felt overhead, Agnes had to set down her spoon.

 

The warmth of the stew she hadn’t yet put in her mouth was regrettably missed.

 

“Why aren’t you eating.”

 

Lionel, who had somehow crossed his arms, tilted his head obliquely.

 

The low voice spread slowly like flames in the fireplace.

 

The tone was softer than expected.

 

She had thought she absolutely wouldn’t see him again tonight, yet he came with such a calm face.

 

Lionel’s face tinted by firelight was different from daytime.

 

Contours sharper in the shadows, making his impression even more fierce and sharp.

 

Just that gaze tightened her chest.

 

As if freshly washed, a faint fragrance came from Lionel. The room was quiet, with no noise like radio static.

 

Still, the presence he exuded heavily shook the air.

 

‘As expected, he’s still scary.’

 

Agnes swallowed dryly.

 

Not to the point reason clouded from fear, but not enough to eat comfortably either.

 

In the end, Agnes glanced briefly at the untouched food and wet her lips with lukewarm water.

 

“I’ve eaten enough. By the way, what brings you here?”

 

“You speak as if I’ve come somewhere I shouldn’t.”

 

“That’s not what I meant. Just… you’ve never visited this room before.”

 

“…I said we’d talk later.”

 

It was a short reply, but the strangely low tone tickled her ears.

 

Not knowing Lionel had personally carried her from the annex to this room before. To Agnes, being in the room with him felt only unfamiliar.

 

Though he frowned at one eye, Lionel didn’t bother correcting Agnes’s words.

 

“Is your shoulder okay?”

 

At that question, Lionel glanced down at his shoulder.

 

“It’s fine. Rather, I’d like you to finish what you were saying in the carriage earlier.”

 

“Ah—”

 

“Why. Have you changed your mind already? Don’t want to say it anymore?”

 

“It’s not that… I was wondering if Your Grace would believe what I say.”

 

Lionel tilted his head languidly.

 

“I’ll try to believe.”

 

It was just one sentence.

 

Yet at those words, Agnes’s eyes widened a bit.

 

Lionel said he would believe her.

 

When the wish that had seemed absurd just earlier became reality, Agnes instead grew anxious.

 

So she asked again several times as if confirming.

 

“Really, really…?”

 

“Really.”

 

Lionel nodded, observing Agnes.

 

To obtain the desired information, he could fabricate belief as much as needed.

 

As if that were difficult.

 

Whether he truly believed Agnes or not wasn’t important.

 

After all, she just needed to say what he wanted to hear.

 

As he predicted, Agnes naively poured out what she knew at the single word of belief.

 

From the administrative errors she mentioned daytime, to the fact that the Sercadia army had weapons from the Bardo trading company. Everything.

 

But there was a problem.

 

Agnes’s words had only circumstances, no clear evidence.

 

Still, Lionel didn’t point that out.

 

He simply waited quietly until Agnes finished speaking.

 

What he realized in the process was that, this time too, there was a gap between rumors and the real Agnes.

 

The Agnes who knew nothing about business and ruined everything she touched had handled administration.

 

Well, it wasn’t important. After all, he just needed to extract information about Rebelt.

 

As no more meaningful words came from Agnes’s mouth, Lionel’s expression gradually cooled to boredom.

 

“Sigh.”

 

He had carved out scarce time to join the conversation.

 

Only this much.

 

The sound of the fireplace flames dying down was heard.

 

Lionel lowered his eyes and fell into thought for a moment.

 

A way to use Agnes more usefully.

 

But strangely, even with nothing more to gain, he couldn’t stand from his seat.

 

“That’s all I have to say. Was it… at least a little helpful?”

 

“Yes, to some extent.”

 

Lionel nodded politely anyway.

 

Yet that shallow consideration felt enormously significant to Agnes.

 

‘It was helpful. Thank goodness.’

 

Agnes watched Lionel’s expression.

 

Though she couldn’t mention the carriage accident, as just bringing it up made her breath catch.

 

Having said most everything else, she felt considerably relieved.

 

In the quieted room, silence flowed again.

 

As the uncomfortable silence lengthened, Agnes’s eyelashes trembled busily.

 

Since the grand theater last time, Lionel had been strange.

 

Listening to her words, even saying he believed.

 

Her chest area tickled.

 

It was dangerous. This feeling wasn’t good.

 

Trying hard to ignore the rising expectation and faint tremble, Agnes fidgeted her hands.

 

“Your Grace, though late, thank you. For saving me.”

 

“No need to thank. I would have saved anyone else too.”

 

At the reply not deviating an inch from expectation, Agnes’s mouth corners rose.

 

“Still, I’m thankful anyway. If not Your Grace, I would have been seriously hurt.”

 

At that sight, Lionel narrowed his brow.

 

It irritated him. What was good about smiling at sharp words.

 

Above all, calling Your Grace, Your Grace at every end grated his nerves.

 

Lionel slowly stood from his seat.

 

He felt he had wasted time needlessly.

 

“Try to eat in the dining room as much as possible. Don’t unnecessarily trouble many people.”

 

“…Yes, I’ll be careful.”

 

Agnes’s face clouded, but Lionel ignored it.

 

The stuffy air in the room felt stickily following.

 

To shake off the uncomfortable warmth, Lionel widened his strides.

 

A faint warning sound rang somewhere in his chest that staying long in this room would misalign something.

 

 

 

☆▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎☆

Author

  • Anna

    Thank you for reading and supporting 🫶💓

    KO-FI

If You Abandon Me

If You Abandon Me

당신이 나를 버리겠다면
Score 9.4
Status: Ongoing Type: , Author: Released: 2025 Native Language: Korean
“Did you really believe that I had truly fallen in love? With a lowly merchant’s daughter, no less?”   Everything had been an empty dream. The burning kisses, the beautiful blue eyes that momentarily revealing fleeting tenderness.   There wasn’t a single shred of sincerity anywhere.   Lionel Edmund Valheim.   Colonel of the Eshvalt Empire’s army and commander of the northern revolution suppression forces. In the heart of this man—her first love and husband—there was no such thing as love.   To Lionel, she was nothing more than the daughter of the enemy who had driven his younger brother to death, and a detestable creature who made a game of money through war.   ***   Lionel grasped Agnes’s hand that refused to look at him.   “Lionel, do you know something?” “What is it?” “That it was you who made my leg like this.”   Lionel’s face slowly distorted.   The light-blue eyes that had always been nothing but cold gradually drowned in despair. Then, from him, who had realized his irredeemable sin, a strangled voice escaped.

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