Chapter 3
I pulled out a sheet of stationery from the drawer and quickly scribbled something down.
“If any gifts or congratulatory letters arrive, keep them stored. And deliver this letter to Father.”
Overwhelmed by the flurry of orders, Wendy stared at me with a blank expression.
“What are you doing just standing there? Get moving.”
“Oh, yes, yes!”
“And when you return, help me get ready. I need to step out for a bit.”
“W-where are you going? Since you’re attending the imperial banquet, shouldn’t we start with a rosewater bath right away?”
“I’m beautiful enough without that, so it’s fine. For the dress, something simpler than usual…”
I glanced out the window.
Looking toward where the ancient temple with its white domed roof, praised as noble, would be, I added one more instruction.
“Bring something that looks devout.”
* * *
To talk about my connection with Leandros Aganilwig, we’d have to go back to our academy days.
With his kind and virtuous nature, and me, branded a villainess by the public, we clashed constantly, earning us the label of sworn enemies.
After a major falling-out, we stopped interacting entirely. Leandros renounced his succession rights after graduating from the academy and stopped appearing in high society, while I distanced myself from the temple, so we had no contact.
Or rather, pretended to have none?
The Aperdita Duchy, a central force among the noble faction, supported the first prince, Anaten Aganelwig.
Thus, the Aperdita family viewed Leandros as a thorn in their side simply for existing.
Though he had renounced his succession rights, he was still the second prince, admired by the empire’s citizens even before receiving his divine mission, and his reputation would only grow after he did.
The family wanted to place Prince Anaten on the throne and me as empress, so naturally, they desired Leandros’s death.
‘I felt the same way.’
Several assassination attempts were made, but as if proving he was loved by the divine, he always escaped death’s grasp.
Given the repeated regressions, it seems he eventually died, though.
‘If I had known his death was the cause of mine, I would’ve stopped it long ago.’
During past regressions, I did everything I could to survive.
To avoid an accidental encounter with the holy relic, I turned against the temple, prevented them from finding the saintess, and even tried to find and destroy the relic first.
But no matter how hard I tried, the holy relic never fell into my hands.
In the end, I failed to escape death, and even died at the hands of my family, thinking it was all futile. But what if the holy relic wasn’t the issue?
I hate uncertainty.
If the path I’ve walked so far was wrong, I needed to find the right one.
‘The answer lies in the temple.’
The carriage stopped in front of the temple.
As I stepped out, the temple, which I had ignored until now, came into view.
Between the pristine white marble buildings, massive pillars adorned with beautiful angel carvings stood, and the floor gleamed so brightly it reflected my face.
Passing through the entrance with its round domed roof, I was greeted by the faint fragrance of flowers from the garden.
Thanks to the chandeliers on the ceiling, the atmosphere felt bright yet warm.
Someone once said that entering the temple felt like being embraced by the divine, but well…
‘It just looks like an old, rundown building to me.’
As I silently observed the temple, Wendy smiled proudly and said,
“You must be surprised to visit the temple after so long, milady.”
‘It’s my first time since the witch trial, so it has been a while. Though all I saw back then was a cold prison floor and the judgment stand.’
Recalling one of my past deaths soured my mood even further.
“But, milady, is there a reason you’re visiting the temple?”
Knowing I didn’t care for the temple, she couldn’t contain her curiosity.
“To meet the divine.”
“You can’t just meet them because you want to, can you?”
“If they have any conscience, they’ll meet me.”
“What?”
Her reaction was even more shocked, but my resolve didn’t waver.
“It’s my birthday. Isn’t it a perfect day for a miracle?”
Continuing the conversation would only waste time, so I brushed Wendy off.
“I’m just going to pray briefly, so you go pay the temple donation.”
“What? You’re really going to pray?”
I was tired of responding to her reactions and headed straight for the prayer room.
Her surprise was understandable.
I had never come to the temple of my own accord.
The reason?
‘I despise the temple.’
In this country, anyone with noble blood is born with at least some divine power.
But despite inheriting the blood of my ducal father and my mother, a former marquess’s daughter, I was born without a shred of divine power.
Those who couldn’t say anything to my face whispered behind my back, calling me ominous, questioning if I was truly the duchess, or even suggesting I was the product of an affair, turning me into a laughingstock.
All because I lacked divine power.
‘I’m not going to become a temple official, so what use is divine power? I hated everything related to the temple.’
As the head of the noble faction, the Aperdita Duchy had no need to align with the temple, and in fact, the more we undermined it, the more we benefited, so the family never stopped my actions.
‘If anything, they supported me.’
I hadn’t done anything to harm the family, so why did they send an assassin to kill me? Why plant one by my side in the first place?
‘That’s not what’s important right now.’
Just as my head felt like it would burst from the flood of betrayal and questions, I fortunately arrived at the prayer room.
Being a public space, people of all ages and genders were seated, praying to the divine.
I quietly took a seat at the back.
I had boldly declared I’d meet the divine, but since the all-knowing god doesn’t intervene in human affairs, it was, as Wendy said, impossible.
Still, I wasn’t entirely without hope.
‘If you earnestly wish, the divine will answer. Surely that day will come for you too, Lady Grace!’
One day before a regression, the saintess confessed she had once heard the divine’s response.
I’m not a saintess, nor do I have her profound faith, but…
‘If you’re listening, answer me. Tell me what I need to do to break this curse. Is it to protect Leandros?’
I was confident the divine would answer me.
‘If you don’t give me an answer, I’ll keep living as I please. I won’t care if he dies, and even if I go mad, I’ll repeat this wretched cycle of death and regression forever. If that’s fine with you, keep ignoring me.’
I couldn’t give up, or I’d truly lose my mind.
It was then.
[Insolent thing.]
The surroundings turned white, and a strange voice echoed in my mind, as if I were alone in the world.
‘Responding to such a threat? So the divine really wants Leandros to live?’
[You’re the only one who’d dare act so arrogantly while bearing the holy relic.]
Ignoring the scolding tone, I focused on the hidden information.
‘Bearing the holy relic? Does that mean the relic is within me?’
I finally understood why I hadn’t heard news of the holy relic across multiple regressions.
‘I only obtained the relic in my first death… It’s been with me ever since.’
It was a shock, like being hit in the back of the head.
My mind raced with this new information, but the divine didn’t wait.
[In light of your piety, I shall answer exactly three questions.]
It was a more merciful offer than I expected, so I asked the question that had haunted me through all my deaths and regressions.
“Tell me how to end the regressions.”
[Save Leandros Aganilwig.]
My guess was correct, and I let out a short sigh.
“Why?”
[Because the holy relic, fused with your body, has linked your life to Leandros’s. All your doubts stem from the relic’s influence.]
“Hah, I figured.”
I glanced down at my body, then roughly pushed back the cumbersome hair falling forward.
‘I’ve been repeating regressions to save Leandros, and since I bear the relic, I retain my memories. To think they had to use a heretic like me. They must be desperate to save Leandros.’
It was unpleasant, but I was the only one who could do it, and I had learned I was the only way.
[So, your final question?]
