Chapter 90
Reina moved her lips hesitantly, struggling to find the words.
“Lately, I’ve been feeling strange. Every time I see you, this odd sensation comes over me.”
“…What kind of sensation?”
“It’s just… even the slightest touch makes me tremble… When you’re far away, I feel a sense of loss, but when you’re close, I get scared all of a sudden and want to run away. Yet, I still want to be near you…”
Reina’s words tumbled out incoherently as she gently traced his cheek, nose, and lips.
Her eyes brimmed with tears, revealing her vulnerable side, as if she didn’t know what to do with him.
Kaiden could only clench his jaw at the feel of her hand on his face.
“I don’t even know what I want to do with you anymore. This version of myself feels so unfamiliar…”
Her fingertips lingered on his lips. In that moment, she longed to feel again the softness of them against her cheek.
Crack.
A faint sound of wood splintering echoed.
Kaiden, straining against the intensity she stirred in him, had finally gripped the carriage seat too hard and broken it.
Reina startled and glanced down, and in that instant, Kaiden spoke.
“Then why not find out?”
“Huh?”
“You said you want to be close. That being apart makes you sad, being near scares you into wanting to flee, but still, you crave that closeness…”
As Kaiden leaned in, Reina pulled her upper body back.
“Wouldn’t getting closer give you the answer?”
Pushed against the wall with no room to move, she had nowhere left to escape.
He gently wiped the tears from near her eyes and whispered softly.
“So, what now? There’s no more running away.”
As if the choice were entirely hers.
“…”
His violet gaze held her captive, intense and unyielding. Somehow, her hand had ended up between their lips, blocking the way.
If she moved it, they might connect right then.
Kaiden stared at her piercingly, aware of it too.
As if daring her: if she wanted to draw near, then do it.
Reina slowly lowered her hand.
Then, lifting her chin, she pressed gently against his lips.
Thump. Thump.
The moment they touched, her heart began to race wildly.
It felt like a broken clock pendulum swinging out of control, her whole body on the verge of bursting.
Reina stayed still for a long while, their lips merely connected.
Now that it had happened, she didn’t know what to do next.
Then, he gently guided her chin downward.
As her lips parted naturally, he didn’t miss the opportunity.
Their open lips met seamlessly.
Tilting his head slightly, he drew her in with a deep tenderness, leaving her breathless.
Her hands flailed aimlessly in the air until he caught them and pulled them down.
Her captured hands and their joined lips. Tears falling on her cheek moistened his.
Between them, there had always been a boundary, and Reina had always feared crossing it.
And now, for the first time, Reina had stepped over that line.
Kaiden moved with the readiness of a warrior poised for action, without hesitation.
In truth, without his ironclad restraint, he would have crossed it long ago.
With the inviting closeness she offered coming to him willingly, there was no reason to hold back.
Even if it was the result of his gentle encouragement, he decided to embrace it shamelessly.
He had no confidence he could resist her charms even if they were less compelling.
‘This is driving me crazy.’
Kaiden was acutely aware of his own responses.
Perhaps because he’d been holding back for so long.
Now that what he’d yearned for was happening, his emotions surged uncontrollably.
His hands twitched, threatening to slip from his control. For now, he contented himself by holding hers tightly, soothing himself.
But his touch was rougher than usual. The way his fingers brushed over the back of her soft hand was more lingering.
Whether she noticed or not, Reina flinched but didn’t pull away.
Just the way her small hand accepted his so compliantly filled him with profound satisfaction.
Meanwhile, Reina was reaching her limits, her mind growing hazy.
She’d drawn near because she wanted to, but now her feelings were intensifying in unexpected ways.
There was nothing left to confirm. Being this close to him felt incredibly sweet.
She realized now that mere brushes against her cheek wouldn’t suffice.
It wasn’t just the closeness she enjoyed.
The relationship between Reina and Kaiden had always been hard to define.
After the experiences of her past life, the emotions she felt toward him were so multifaceted.
Friendship, loyalty, compassion, self-reproach, peace, joy.
Every feeling she could imagine was tied to him.
Being with him stirred everything into a whirlwind that she thought couldn’t be summed up in one word.
But in this moment, Reina discovered the magical word that could bind it all together.
‘I think I like Kaiden.’
It was love. Everything she felt for him was love.
She had to admit that was the only reason she was so drawn to him right now.
And she desperately hoped he felt the same.
“Hah…”
Reina let out a ragged breath. The connection he offered was overwhelming.
Just as she thought she might be consumed by it, he sighed lowly and pulled back.
He feared if it went any further, he wouldn’t be able to stop.
She’d only just opened her heart; he couldn’t risk scaring her away.
“Is that enough to confirm?”
Unable to fully compose his gaze, he murmured softly.
Reina looked at him with a hint of resentment as he drew away.
Her eyes still held the lingering warmth. She could tell he felt the same reluctance.
“And you?”
“I never needed confirmation.”
“…”
“I only needed yours. My answer has always been set.”
At his words, Reina’s lips trembled slightly.
She didn’t need to ask what his fixed answer was; she could guess.
“So do as you wish. I’ve been in the palm of your hand for a long time now.”
Kaiden’s sincere response sent a rush of warmth through her. It carried more weight than a simple declaration of love.
It meant he was handing her the reins. Words that could only come from boundless trust and affection.
“I’m so weak when it comes to you. The mere thought of a world without you makes me feel like I could die.”
He muttered to himself, grabbing a cushion from the carriage and placing it on his lap, as if hastily concealing something.
Fortunately, Reina didn’t notice his unusual behavior.
In truth, her attention was still fixed on his lips.
The lips that had just confessed his love seemed so endearing.
Reina slowly approached him again.
“I… still…”
“…Hm?”
“…I mean, a bit more with you…”
I think I want to stay close.
As Reina hesitated, swallowing the rest of her words, the carriage came to a stop.
“We’ve arrived at the mansion!”
At the coachman’s oblivious shout, they both startled and pressed against the walls.
Reina’s reaction was the most intense. She nearly bolted upright in the carriage and hit her head.
If Kaiden hadn’t quickly reached out, she would have bumped it for sure.
“Are you okay?”
Even at Kaiden’s concerned question, Reina was in a panic. She hurriedly pressed against the wall and smoothed her disheveled hair.
‘What on earth was I about to say?’
Her face burned. If the carriage hadn’t stopped, her impulsive words might have begged for more closeness.
