Chapter 113. No. There’s nothing to explain
Early in the dawn, at the sound of birds chirping outside the window, Deborah’s closed eyes opened.
Still drowsy with sleep, her eyes slowly blinked open and closed for a long while before suddenly widening greatly in an instant.
Deborah quickly pulled herself upright and began slowly retracing the memories of the previous night.
‘Yesterday…….’
Scenes flashed rapidly through her mind.
Deborah’s pale face gradually darkened.
Deborah slowly turned her head and looked down at the sleeping face of the man lying beside her.
“…….”
Whether because his tension had fully released, or because of the repeated gentle patting on her back—he had fallen asleep unbelievably quickly.
And so deeply that he had slept soundly until this very hour, completely oblivious to the world.
The peaceful atmosphere enveloping this bedroom would, the moment she stepped outside that door, lead Deborah into an entirely different world.
Piercing glares, whispering voices, and then……
Thinking of that last part, Deborah immediately shook her head vigorously.
She did not want to think that far ahead yet.
—There’s nothing to worry about.
“…….”
The words the man had said last night.
She did not know how far she could truly believe those words, but she wanted to believe them as much as possible.
No—she wanted to believe them.
Because if she did not, all that would remain in this situation was despair.
At that moment, the man shifted in his sleep.
Deborah pulled the sheet over the exposed bare back of the man who was lying facing away from her.
He was someone who had always woken up around the same time she opened her eyes, yet seeing him sleep so soundly like this, he must have been quite tired.
The slightly brownish long eyelashes, the remarkably straight and prominent nose bridge, the nicely plump lips.
After gazing for a long time at that face, which resembled a beautifully sculpted statue, Deborah carefully slipped out of bed.
She had wanted to wait until the man woke up, but for now, she had to return to the attic first.
Among those who would have heard the rumors that spread last night, one of them was Hanna.
Though she was afraid and terrified, she still had to go and explain.
The reason she had to deceive her all this time, and why she had no choice but to do so.
Praying desperately that she might find even a little courage to open that door and step out, Deborah slowly walked toward it.
* * *
After taking a deep breath, Deborah finally pulled the doorknob.
With a click as the door opened, she caught sight of Hanna’s body flinching slightly while she was preparing for the morning.
Deborah exhaled once more and slowly walked toward Hanna.
“……Hanna.”
“…….”
Even at the sound of her name being called, Hanna remained standing with her back turned, not moving an inch.
A heavy silence settled over the narrow attic.
With trembling lips, Deborah mustered her courage once more and called Hanna’s name.
“Hanna…….”
At the second call, Hanna finally turned her body around slowly.
Even though she had expected it, the cold expression she had never seen before made one side of her chest throb painfully without realizing it.
“I thought you wouldn’t come back here anymore, but you still came.”
“…….”
“Even when the whole mansion was buzzing with that talk yesterday…… I just thought it was nonsense. It couldn’t be…… You’re not the kind of person who would deceive me so perfectly, Deborah.”
“…….”
“And if something like that had really happened, how could I have been so completely in the dark? We sleep together in this cramped attic and wake up together—how could…….”
At the words that flowed out in dejection, Deborah could not say anything at all.
“Is it really…… true? Like what the others are saying—is it really true that you and the duke…… are in that kind of relationship?”
The stammering question, as if she could not believe it, was filled entirely with the hope that it was not so.
The wish that she had not been so perfectly deceived, the desire to still believe.
How wonderful it would have been if she could have said she had never deceived her……
But in a moment like this, there was only one thing she had to say.
To tell everything truthfully and ask for forgiveness.
Deborah closed her eyes tightly once, then opened them and slowly began to speak.
“……It’s true.”
At the calm words that fell, Hanna’s stiffened face collapsed for a moment as if all strength had drained away.
After a long silence, Hanna asked again.
“Then, really…… while I was asleep, you secretly slipped out…… and kept going back and forth to the duke’s bedroom—is that what you’re saying?”
“…….”
“And not long ago, when Teacher Helena said she was throwing a birthday party or whatever and you stayed out overnight…… that was all…….”
Seeing Deborah tightly pressing her lips together, unable to give any answer, Hanna seemed to have found all the answers she needed.
Ha—a hollow, empty laugh escaped through Hanna’s teeth for a moment.
“They say you only truly know a person after experiencing them…… My mother always said that until her lips wore out…… But still, I really didn’t think you were that kind of person.”
At the reproachful words spoken with a twisted smile, Deborah hurriedly opened her mouth at last.
“Hanna, let me explain. I’ll explain everything. From the beginning, it wasn’t that I intended to deceive you—”
“No. There’s nothing to explain.”
Hanna cut off the rambling words with a single sharp stroke, without even listening to the end.
“I don’t want to hear anything that comes out of your mouth—so don’t bother trying to explain to me.”
“Hanna, please…….”
She knew that all of this was her own doing, yet somewhere in her heart she had thought that Hanna, of all people, would understand her.
Sometimes like a real sibling, sometimes like a friend she had known since childhood.
Because Hanna was the only person who had warmly accepted her when she had nowhere else to turn and felt so lonely.
But despite that desperate plea, Hanna’s expression grew even colder.
“It must have been hard for you all this time, watching your step because of me. Why don’t you just tell the duke now and move to another room?”
“…….”
“Oh, have you already told him?”
“No, no. Hanna…… I never did that.”
Seeing Deborah shake her head and deny it, Hanna let out a scoff.
“Why? You must have had your own desires to come and go from the duke’s bedroom—so how long were you planning to stay in this old, cramped attic?”
“Desires……?”
“Yes. Since everything’s already out in the open, why not just be honest? Surely you weren’t thinking of becoming the duchess, but if you play your cards right, couldn’t you at least secure the position of mistress? Or else, like that maid who got pregnant with Viscount Lamprey’s child, demand that he set you up properly.”
“…….”
“Just ask him once. Everyone has tried so hard to catch the duke’s eye and not a single one has succeeded—yet you managed that incredible feat. Don’t you think Hanna who had always chattered away—was something Deborah had never imagined.
Her face grew progressively paler at the filthy words spilling from her own lips.
Hanna, too, bit her lip hard at the words that had burst out of her.
After confronting each other in tense silence for a long while, Hanna suddenly snatched the apron lying on the bed and quickly brushed past Deborah.
Before opening the door to leave, Hanna paused for a moment and, still with her back turned, spoke in a low voice.
“If you don’t move out, I’ll tell Madam Charlotte myself. To give you another room.”
With those final words, the attic door slammed shut violently.
Until that moment, Deborah remained standing in that very spot, frozen as if turned to stone, without the slightest movement.
* * *
“You must have been summoned since morning.”
Chorrr—the hot steam rose in wisps as the brownish tea poured into the cup.
Looking at the face visible across from him, Philip wore a peculiar smile.
At Raymond von Cheister, who—despite having caused such an enormous incident yesterday—was sitting there so nonchalantly.
At the sudden remark, Raymond’s eyelids slowly lifted.
He had glanced back down at his teacup upon seeing the crown prince grinning as if he had witnessed something amusing.
“Well—”
At that languid reply, Philip gave a short laugh as if he had expected it.
“You should have seen the grand duchess’s expression right after you disappeared with that maid yesterday.”
Of course she would have looked that way.
In matters concerning women, she had never once imagined that he would do such a thing—so the shock must have been immense.
Moreover, it had happened in front of the crown prince and the invited guests, making it all the more so.
“So what do you plan to do from now on?”
Philip changed the question this time, directing it toward the still-silent Raymond.
“You wouldn’t have done something like that without any thought.”
“…….”
“Surely you’re not thinking of breaking off the marriage talks with the young lady of the Constant marquessate and installing that maid as duchess.”
“…….”
While Philip threw out all sorts of speculations in place of the silent counterpart, his eyebrows suddenly twitched.
Raymond, who had been slowly savoring the tea aroma, set the cup down on the table and looked straight at the person sitting across from him.
“Why ‘surely’?”
“…….”
Philip’s brow furrowed deeper and deeper as he looked at the faintly upturned corner of Raymond’s smiling lips.
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