HACS 109

A long time ago—

well, actually, about four months ago.

Life as Wolfram von Lohengrin had been so exciting that the life of “Super Young-jin,” the operator of the D/Z SAGA café, now felt like a distant past.

Anyway, let me talk a bit about the café back then.

It was a chaotic mess.

First, the Eve faction and the Regina faction fought every single day.

If the Regina faction posted garbage, the Eve faction came in to curse them out; if the Eve faction posted garbage, the Regina faction came in to curse them out.

Café Master Super Young-jin had to survive on a fierce battlefield every single day, dealing with all sorts of mentally deranged people.

Especially vicious were the Regina faction—those bastards are unforgivable. The ones who ruined the café… Troublemaking is cleansing, haha!

Anyway, even I had a sanctuary for my heart, a peaceful resting place—there was a particularly peaceful board within the café.

To be precise, there *used to be* one.

The Mini-Game Heaven Board.

**[Mini-games are really fun! lol Best ever!]**

**[Ah. What do I even do with Stat-2 Eve ㅠㅠ Should I restart?]**

**[Warehouse organization MAXed. Can I get the Enchanting Rabbit Ears with this?]**

A board where everyone happily played and enjoyed themselves.

This board alone, with nothing to manage, put me at ease.

But that day—

**[lol ah minigames are trash lol 21min clear]**

**[lol 21min lol lol that’s hilarious you idiot lmao is that even a score?]**

Everything changed.

—

The cause was a patch.

D/Z SAGA’s developers frequently released free content, typo corrections, and bug patches.

The developers put that much love into it, and there were even several DLCs.

There was even an episode hinting at a sequel, probably?

But despite being such a game—

one of the patches brought a truly horrific conclusion for me.

**[Buggy play of ‘Regina Ciela’ has been discovered and will be patched.**

**1. Additional discounts no longer apply to the [Great Magic Merchant’s Blessing] discount rate.**

**2. The usage method of [Swamp] will change. This is—]**

First, the biggest change was this.

If you go all the way through Regina’s route, you get the bond skill [Great Magic Merchant’s Blessing], which cuts item purchase prices by 50%.

But if you messed around with it a bit, the selling price became higher than the buying price, resulting in infinite inflation—a bug. It was immediately fixed.

Naturally, that save file was no longer compatible with later versions. Praise the devs.

As a result, the Regina faction bastards wailed, and at the time I laughed at those foolish Regina fans.

But the patch that followed made me cry.

**[Time lapse will now be recorded for mini-games. Take screenshots and show off your results to your heart’s content.]**

At first, I thought it was no big deal.

To be honest.

What would change just because mini-game time lapse records are displayed?

Just some tryhards over-invested in the game taking screenshots of new records and showing off.

But that was my delusion.

Every single bastard who believed themselves to be a veteran did mini-game runs.

**[15 hours playtime, mini-game 1 clear in 25 minutes—is that okay?]**

**[The person above has a great score. I got 16 minutes 50 seconds in 12 hours… ㅇㅅㅇ.]**

**[No scores over 15 minutes accepted.]**

**[Honestly? Over 15 minutes doesn’t even seem human, right?]**

All sorts of boasting and bravado. A nest of garbage troublemakers running wild.

What was even more annoying was that the real veterans mostly stayed quiet, while the newbie bastards cleared Mini-Game Dungeon 1 and started acting like they were veterans because they cleared it fast.

Troublemakers… I’ll kill them all.

I’ll fill my heart with their blood!

So I gritted my teeth and did it. Like crazy.

My heart’s sanctuary, the Mini-Game Heaven Board, had already become a nest of troublemakers.

To protect this board, I worked hard.

And at some point, I achieved enlightenment.

Wait—I can reduce the time overwhelmingly.

And my prediction was right.

I immediately cleared Dungeon 1 and obtained a “record worthy of a veteran” and headed toward the board overrun with troublemakers.

**[Honestly, I think I’m better at mini-games than the café master lol ;;;]**

**[Ah, agree agree lol Super Young-jin? I saw his old post—Dungeon 1 in 14 minutes 20 seconds… well, not that I’m saying anything~~]**

To kill all the troublemakers, absolute rules were necessary.

And I decided to become that rule myself.

**[Dungeon 1 Time Lapse.]**

Mini-Game Dungeon No. 1. Zefflin Common Knowledge Quiz, 20 questions.

Clear time.

2 minutes 39.7 seconds.

**[?]**

**[??]**

**[WTF is this for real? No way;;;;]**

**[Isn’t that edited?]**

**[Honestly looks edited, but you never know with Young-jin-sama;;;]**

**[Even Young-jin-sama, this doesn’t make sense—how do you solve 20 questions in 2 minutes 40 seconds wtf;]**

**[Ah, just type lol if it’s not edited~~ lol ah]**

Naturally, editing controversies arose.

**[Wrist verification.]**

But afterward, I uploaded a video of my wrist as well, putting an end to all controversies.

Even the clear time was 2 minutes 38.63 seconds—an improvement.

**[Is that human????????]**

**[lmao wtf how does a human do that lmao 3 minutes lmao]**

**[Guys, isn’t there a pattern to this?]**

**[Dungeon 1 is completely random pattern—though sometimes you see familiar questions]**

**[How do you know that?]**

**[Before Young-jin-sama’s record update, I was 1st place;; 13 minutes 42 seconds;]**

**[Oh, then that’s legit;]**

Having proven my skill, purified the board, and become absolute rule, I posted an announcement.

**[From now on, boasting posts and troublemaking posts in the Mini-Game Heaven Board will be immediately deleted and the user banned for 1 day. If you don’t like it, come back after getting a sub-2-minute record.]**

And so, world peace was preserved.

—

Now then, how was I able to clear the 20-question quest in under 3 minutes back then?

By using my own “ears.”

**[Next question. The fastest route to the Castle of Eternal Ice from the Snowfield of Bubbling Shadows in northern Zefflin?]**

“Entrance. Left. Right. Up. Up. Down. Right. Up. Jump.”

**[Correct.]**

I tuned my “ears” while solving two questions.

Fortunately, there wasn’t much difference from when I cleared it as Lee Young-jin.

I was worried this guy’s ears might be bad, but thankfully not.

Now, shall I start speeding up?

**[Next question. In the Fourth Battlefield—]**

“Elphirane’s Jewel.”

**[Correct.]**

“Uh, uh…?”

“It sounded like the question wasn’t even fully spoken just now…?”

The outfield is noisy.

“You two. Be quiet.”

“…U-ugh. Who do you think you are, Wolfram! If I had my mana! I’d have—pierced your solar plexus with a Starlight Cannon!”

“I-I can at least act as a shield!”

Eve flailed her hands in the air in frustration, and Nefty shouted with a resolute gaze.

No, that’s not what I meant.

“It’s not showing off or bluffing. Be quiet. If I can’t hear the questions, will you take responsibility?”

“…U-ugh. It’s even more infuriating because you’re right!”

“Ah… yes. I’ll be quiet! Come, President. Since we’re not helpful, let’s step back and watch!”

Nefty dragged Eve to the corner, and only then, alone, could I fully focus my senses on my “ears.”

**[Next question. The First Emperor Haruk’s—]**

“Strength 25.”

**[Correct.]**

After memorizing 500 questions, when they rot and settle, you can hear it.

The “tone” of the questioner’s voice.

For example, just now when the voice said “The First Emperor Haruk’s”—at the part “Haruk’s,” how is the accent given? Is the voice tone high or low? What’s the speed? All of those have “differences.”

**[Next question. Among the Tier 1 skills. Among those called the Three Great Blessings. The first—]**

“Heavenly Grace’s Blessing.”

**[Correct.]**

For questions where the beginning is completely identical and only which number blessing it is differs, you need to listen a bit more.

**[Next question. Bl—]**

“Piltia.”

**[Correct.]**

This was lucky.

Among the 500 questions, there are three that start with “Bl.”

And if that “Bl” pronunciation is distinctively low, it narrows down to one.

So the full question is “The Blue Dragon who resides in the desert—what is her name?” and the answer is “Piltia.”

Now, by “analyzing all voices,” “knowing which question comes with which tone,” and “rerolling until all questions can be distinguished”—you get that kind of score.

That’s how I solved the questions one by one, feeling that old sensation.

Ah, this is fun.

Lately it’s been nothing but stressful events, so I need to relieve stress with mini-games like this.

“Wh-what is this… this fear I can’t comprehend… my body won’t stop trembling.”

“D-don’t worry, President. …W-Wolfram-senpai is a good person. Really…”

The kids in the outfield were looking at me like I was a monster, and even Eve’s whimpering became noise—but I didn’t care at all.

Honestly, to be honest.

Nefty, who ran the battlefield with me; Eve, who was a heroine but worse for my mental health than heroin; annoying Regina; Emily as always—

There were plenty of joys in D/Z SAGA becoming reality, but in a way, everyone becoming real also came with its own exhaustion.

Trying to recognize game characters as real people and treat them accordingly isn’t something you can do with ordinary effort.

But right now, this mini-game is, no matter what anyone says, the game system itself.

So I can enjoy and tear through it to my heart’s content as the veteran, Lee Young-jin.

“…Ha, ahahaha! Give me the next question. Hurry!”

**[Final question. Among the seven seals that open the gates of the demon world. The third—]**

“Behind the Ice Crystal Palace.”

**[Correct! 20 out of 20 questions, all correct! Clear time: 4 minutes 38 seconds!]**

“Hm.”

Compared to before, it’s noticeably lacking, but that just means I need to practice.

Considering this situation as Wolfram rather than Lee Young-jin, it’s not a bad score.

Moreover—

**[Congratulations on your clear! Wolfram von Lohengrin. Eve von Lohengrin. Nephtherian—clear confirmed! Rewards will be distributed! What would you like to receive?]**

I get to choose this reward.

“Eve. Nefty. Come here.”

“Don’t order me around.”

“Y-yes, Senpai!”

I briefly explained to the two that the dungeon was cleared and we needed to choose rewards.

“…”

At my words, the two fell into a strange silence.

What, do they not want rewards?

“I really didn’t do anything. I don’t feel right taking a reward.”

“I agree with the President’s words, Senpai. …Hmm, even if a reward is offered, I don’t have the conscience to—”

Ah. I see.

And here I was worrying about something useless.

“It’s fine. It’s not that great of a reward anyway.”

Looking at Eve and Nefty’s current state, I roughly organized my thoughts.

“Eve, is the staff you’re using right now a Wood Stick?”

“…Yes. What’s wrong with it?”

“It doesn’t exactly command respect, does it.”

The Wood Stick is the worst staff. Nefty is probably still using the iron plate shield I gave her before.

If I’m going to drag them along on expeditions later, it’d be good to get them properly geared.

I selected equipment for Eve and Nefty and handed it over—their eyes went wide.

“This is…”

“O-oh wow… I-isn’t this…”

Hmm.

In-game, equipment that’s only useful up until Act 3.

But in current Zefflin, it’s fairly high-grade gear. For starters, it has triple options.

Eve stared blankly at the staff, then let out a deep sigh and nodded.

“Wolfram. Truly… this place is infused with our ancestor’s arrangements.”

“…?”

“You master Zefflin’s knowledge, hone yourself, and after competing with pure intellect alone, you obtain such a treasure… Honestly, it’s an excessive treasure. I’ll use it preciously.”

No, you interpret it that way?

But it’s too much trouble to correct, so I let it be.

Anyway, next is my reward.

This mini-dungeon actually has a hidden reward.

“I cleared it within 5 minutes, so there should be a bonus, right? I want that.”

[Of course! You want that instead of equipment, skill books, spell tomes, spirit stones, or materials?]

“Hm. I’ll use the ‘Secret Lovely Potion.’”

[Yes. However, this item is limited to first-time use—it cannot be stored and must be used immediately. Once used, the effect lasts for 2 weeks, followed by a 2-week recharge period. Do you agree?]

“Hm. I agree.”

It sounds ridiculous just by name, but it’s actually a great item.

In the game, it has the effect of “slightly increasing the ease of raising affinity with characters.”

As a mini-game reward, it’s an item that improves player convenience.

Of course, it has the odd limitation of being time-limited, and once obtained, it’s automatically applied to the save file—can’t be stored.

Immediate activation. 2 weeks active, then 2 weeks recharge.

Then another 2 weeks active cycle.

But in the end, it makes affinity grinding with allies a bit easier.

Anyway.

What is Wolfram von Lohengrin’s weakness?

It’s that he’s “hated by the world.”

So if I use this, the chances of getting stabbed while walking around will decrease!