Episode 3
Looking down at me while raking his hand through his neatly groomed red hair, Aidan made me bow my head once more.
“…Yes, I’m sorry.”
“Is ‘I’m sorry’ the only thing you know how to say?”
“….”
“Tsk, now you’ve completely closed your mouth.”
Clicking his tongue, he turned around and walked away. Only then did I exhale the breath I had been holding. Right, I couldn’t keep being a burden to others like this. The moment I got off work, I headed straight to the hospital.
While listening to my story, the doctor, whose hair was flecked with gray, did nothing but twirl the pen in his hand around and around.
“Doctor, you think I’m crazy too, don’t you?”
At my self-deprecating question, the doctor gave no particular answer. Instead, he showed a benevolent smile.
“Please don’t worry too much. Still, patients who acknowledge their own symptoms like this tend to have a good prognosis.”
“…Is that so?”
As expected, it seems that even in the doctor’s eyes, I looked like a delusional patient. Fiddling with my fingers resting on my knees, I hung my head low.
“Occasionally, there are people like you, young lady.”
“Really?”
“Of course. A while ago, a lady who desperately wanted a child came in with her husband, claiming that she had a child who was kidnapped.”
The doctor scribbled down a prescription as he spoke.
“Might it be that you, too, desperately wanted parents, young lady? You said you attended the academy, right?”
“Yes, that’s right.”
“Weren’t there perhaps classmates around you who were exceptionally close with their families? Looking at those friends, you were envious. Thinking, ‘It would be nice if I had a family too, then I would treat them so well.’ There are people who engage in exceptionally vivid fantasies like that. As they continue to imagine, they end up believing those fantasies.”
The doctor handed the prescription over to me.
“First, let’s start with the medicine written here. Since I’ve set the dosage to a minimum, there shouldn’t be any major side effects in your daily life, but if you feel too sleepy or see things like hallucinations, please visit the hospital right away.”
Right, even a specialist says I’m a delusional disorder patient. Dad never existed.
After getting the medication, I tore open one packet and took it right on the spot before heading out into the street.
I wanted to get some fresh air. After all, for the past few days, I had done nothing but wander around frantically looking for Dad.
“Ha… ha-ha.”
A laugh escaped me.
I was the top student at the academy, and my advisor wanted me to continue my studies.
However, giving up research and choosing the profession of an Imperial Palace civil servant was all for quick employment.
It was to support Dad by taking out a stable loan from the Imperial Palace bank, so it was hilarious to realize that no such dad ever existed to begin with.
“Ah, I walked all the way to the academy.”
Without realizing it, I must have just walked straight ahead. To go home, I had to walk in the opposite direction.
How long will it take to go back again? Not a single thing is going right.
Ever since Dad disappeared, every day has been like this lately. Since I wasn’t in my right mind, it was a natural outcome.
“Oh, isn’t that Cynthia?”
Someone called out to me warmly just as I was turning my body around to head back.
“Young Lady, how have you been?”
It was the baker whose shop I often visited to buy snacks while attending the academy. As I stepped into the bakery, the savory scent of freshly baked bread pleasantly stimulated my nose.
“I heard you became an Imperial Palace civil servant, but what brings you all the way here?”
“I just kept walking and ended up over here before I knew it.”
“My goodness, ha-ha. Don’t just stand there, take one of these with you.”
It was a sandwich stuffed full of the potato salad I frequently bought and ate.
“It’s 5 silver, right?”
“Forget it, how many times did you come to my shop while attending the academy? It’s nothing special, but think of it as a employment gift from me.”
“Young Lady…”
Still, taking it for free didn’t feel right. Looking around, I pointed at the chocolates.
“Then I’ll buy these. Please give me all the remaining ones.”
“You don’t usually like sweet things like this.”
“That’s true, but I plan to give them as gifts to my colleagues.”
Since they must have suffered a lot because of me all this time.
“Look at you, already knowing how to navigate social life. You’ve really grown up.”
Smiling, the baker packed the beautifully wrapped chocolates into the paper bag along with the sandwich.
“The Imperial Palace is in the opposite direction from here, but please drop by to visit often anyway.”
“Of course. I think I’ll visit often just because I miss the taste of your bread.”
“My, listen to you.”
It was right around the time the hearty laughter subsided.
Rumble—
“Oh dear, it looks like it’s going to pour rain.”
A loud rumble of thunder echoed, and raindrops began to fall onto the ground with soft plops.
“My, my. It’s going to rain quite a bit, isn’t it?”
“It seems so.”
Judging by the force of the rainfall, it wasn’t a rain that would stop anytime soon. Just as I was looking up at the sky with a troubled expression, an arrogant voice struck my ears.
“If you block the entrance, customers won’t be able to go in.”
A sharp tone. Looking ahead, Aidan stood there holding a black umbrella just like himself.
“Oh, it’s Young Lord Aidan. You came to buy this today as well, right? The cute Animal Farm Cookie set!”
The cute Animal Farm Cookie set? That cookie set baked into cute characters just as its charming name suggested?
That cookie set crammed full of chocolate chips that looked sweet just by looking at it? This Aidan buys that?
The very Aidan who buttons his uniform up to the top of his neck even in the sweltering heat of summer?
“W-What on earth are you talking about?”
“Ha-ha, you buy it all the time. Didn’t you come by just the day before yesterday and purchase ten sets?”
“Ahem!”
Aidan cleared his throat and closed his umbrella as he walked inside.
“I-I simply came to buy a sandwich.”
It didn’t seem like it, but I just let it pass.
“What are you doing here?”
“As you can see, I’m waiting for a bit because of the rain, but it doesn’t look like it’s going to stop. I think I’ll just brave it and go.”
As I was about to open the door and step out, a large hand grabbed my arm.
“Are you crazy? What if you catch a cold going out in this?”
Aidan grumbled as he raised his umbrella.
“I’ll walk you back.”
“Pardon?”
Was it because I was so appalled? One of his eyebrows furrowed.
“Just imagine if you caught a cold. Wouldn’t that disrupt our work? You can’t even focus properly right now, so are you trying to disturb the people around you while sniffling too?”
I thought as much. There was no way he was doing it out of concern for me. Still, sharing an umbrella together felt uncomfortable.
“You’re as dishonest with your feelings as ever, Young Lord.”
The baker said as he slyly slipped the Animal Farm Cookie set into the paper bag containing the sandwich.
“Ah, Cynthia! Come to think of it, there should be an umbrella among the lost items. Hold on just a moment.”
The baker pulled out a large basket and rummaged through it. A coin purse the size of a palm, a pencil case, textbooks. Pulling out all sorts of items, the baker finally pulled out a blue umbrella and shouted:
“Ah, ah, ah, here it is!”
It was at that moment. My heart throbbed at a worn bag strap that had been pulled along, caught on the umbrella’s strap. On the black bag strap, the initials A.V were crookedly engraved. Those very initials that I had once engraved after hearing him say that his bag was confusing because it was identical to those of all the other mercenaries.
“Where did you get this bag?”
“Huh? Ah, that. Why, does it belong to someone you know?”
The baker pulled out the bag and handed it to me.
“I picked it up on the day of the academy graduation ceremony. It was dropped there all alone, and since nobody claimed it, I brought it along with me for the time being.”
“Wait, let me take a look.”
Initials can overlap by coincidence. How many similar names are there in the world, after all?
“Sure, go ahead.”
However, on this bag were the exact traces of thread where Dad had stitched it up multiple times, saying it was comfortable and nice even when I told him to throw it away and buy a new one.
Could this be a coincidence? Had my delusions gotten worse?
With hands trembling violently, I opened the bag.
“This is…”
It was a notebook that likewise had Dad’s initials written on it. As if spellbound, I opened the notebook.
[Tomorrow is Cynthia’s graduation ceremony.]
Dad’s handwriting. My eyes blurred at the sight of that nostalgic handwriting. Fearing that it might vanish before my eyes, I slowly stroked the letters.
[It’s hard to believe how fast time flies. That infant who did nothing but clutch my finger tightly has now grown up admirably into an Imperial Palace civil servant. I cannot describe how relieved I am that she grew up well.]
There was a trace where the ink had pooled heavily. As if he had paused his pen for a long while.
[May Cynthia’s life continue tobe happy in the future.]
The sentence below that had been painted over multiple times, so I couldn’t read it properly, but one thing was certain regardless.
Dad existed. I didn’t have delusional disorder.
