If the emperor himself held the records, I might have found a way to see them. But with the Black Priests, there was no chance.
“They helped me once before. Could they help again?”
The Black Priests, who never involved themselves beyond the imperial bloodline, had stepped in to confirm my lineage—an unprecedented event. I clung to a sliver of hope.
“The reason they acted then…” Sys’s face clouded with unease. My father spoke up instead.
“It was because His Highness made a deal with them.”
“A deal?”
“They only appear for the emperor’s coronation.”
“No!”
I stared at Sys, shocked. He avoided my gaze, his expression awkward.
“You didn’t trade your coronation for proof of my lineage, did you?”
“I asked on a whim, and surprisingly, they agreed. It worked out.”
“Are you insane?”
I had no other words. He’d forsaken the Black Priests’ validation of his bloodline.
“My golden eyes already prove my lineage. Their validation isn’t necessary anymore.”
“No emperor in the empire’s history has been crowned without their approval. You know what that means—how could you make such a foolish choice?”
“Because you’re more important to me.”
His golden eyes, symbolizing imperial legitimacy, met mine unflinchingly.
“Proving my lineage means nothing compared to you.”
“But…”
“If I lost you, the throne would mean nothing.”
There was no trace of his usual playfulness. His tone was grave, resolute, without a hint of deceit.
Sys had endured threats from the First Consort since birth, driven solely by his ambition to become emperor. Yet now, he said the throne was worthless—for me.
“Even if this stirs doubts about my legitimacy, I don’t care. As long as you’re by my side.”
I tried to speak, my lips trembling, but no words came. His love was so vast, so deep, it brought tears to my eyes.
His warmth enveloped me. Tears spilled despite myself.
I don’t know how long I cried. When I came to, I was buried in his embrace. At some point, his hand had begun gently patting my back, soothing me like a child.
Emptying my pent-up emotions left me relieved, but as my tears stopped, embarrassment and awkwardness kept me from lifting my head.
“Are you calm now?”
As if sensing it, Sys stopped patting and pressed his lips to my crown.
“Twice would be too much.”
His low voice resonated through me, from my head to my core.
I hadn’t cried like this since my grandfather’s death. Exhausted from sobbing, my body felt limp. But I couldn’t stay in his arms forever.
“…What do you mean?”
Taking a deep breath, I sat up, pretending to be fine. His shirt was visibly soaked from my tears.
Unable to meet his gaze, I turned away, feigning nonchalance. His hand gently turned my face back to him.
“Seeing you cry, I didn’t know what to do.”
His fingers brushed my eyes, catching lingering tears.
I wanted to hide my flushed face, but his grip held me firmly.
“It felt like my heart was tearing apart.”
His forehead touched mine, his breath warm against my skin.
“I never want to see you cry again.”
“Was I that ugly?”
“That’s not what I mean, Bee.”
He chuckled, releasing my face. I tried to pull back, wiping my tears, but he grabbed my arm, pulling me back into his embrace, as if he couldn’t bear the distance.
“I hate women’s tears. Crocodile tears shed for manipulation are repulsive.”
He shuddered, likely recalling something. I could guess why.
Raised among the emperor’s consorts, he’d seen tears weaponized. I didn’t know why he’d once made an exception for Irene, but love can blind even the sharpest eyes.
Does that blindness still hold, just with a new target?
Testing him felt wrong, but curiosity and a twinge of jealousy overpowered my restraint.
“So, you hate me, too?”
“Of course not.”
He gripped my shoulders, lifting my chin. His deep eyes held only me.
“Strangely, your tears don’t repulse me. They’re beautiful, almost blindingly so.”
“…”
“Your sadness breaks my heart, yet your tears are so sweet I can’t resist.”
His tongue traced my cheek, lingering near my eyes, as if erasing my tears.
“But I never want to see you cry again.”
His lips brushed mine, light as a feather, then pulled away. His red lips curved into a gentle smile.
“Unless it’s in bed—then I’d love to see it.”
“…!”
“So, cry only in bed, Bee.”
His sudden comment left me speechless. I narrowed my eyes, scolding him.
“You’re saying that now?”
“What’s wrong with now? Making your beloved cry in bed is a man’s dream—”
I pinched his side hard, cutting off his shameless retort.
“Must you say that with Father here?”
“Where’s the marquis?”
He grumbled, rubbing his side, sounding wronged. I turned and realized Father was gone.
“If he were here, I couldn’t have held you so long. You think he’d let me, when he loses all reason over you?”
Though my protests had softened my father’s stance, he still disapproved of Sys.
His words were exaggerated but not baseless.
If Sys so much as touched me, Father’s glare could burn holes. Sometimes, he physically separated us, citing propriety before marriage.
Father wouldn’t have stood by while I cried in Sys’s arms.
“When did he leave?”
“Not long after you fell into my arms. The palace called.”
I hadn’t even noticed, so consumed by emotion.
Embarrassment at my vulnerability heated my face again. I fanned my cheeks to cool them.
“The emperor summoned him urgently.”
“Father left me crying for His Majesty?”
I tilted my head at Sys’s words.
Father was the emperor’s vassal. Though he sometimes acted otherwise, he upheld his duties.
Before, I’d have thought it normal for him to leave. But now, I knew better. No matter the emperor’s command, he’d never leave me crying.
Sys knew this, too.
“Normally, he’d ignore even an imperial order. You’re his priority.”
“Something’s wrong.”
For Father to leave me like that, it had to be serious. Sys’s face turned bitter.
“Canaan Kingdom declared war.”
“War? Didn’t they disband their forces?”
Caught amassing troops after the First Prince’s incident, Canaan had dissolved their army to survive. What gave them the audacity to challenge the empire now?
“Exactly. That’s why it’s puzzling.”
“Shouldn’t you go?”
“I should.”
He nodded slowly. As crown prince, he should’ve rushed to the palace, but he stayed for me, unable to leave me crying.
Despite the cascade of unexpected events weakening me, I couldn’t wallow. Straightening, I spoke firmly.
“Go to the palace. I’ll handle things here.”
Sys hesitated, his eyes searching mine.
“Are you sure?”
“Yes. El needs me, and the empire needs you. We both have our duties.”
He sighed, then stood, pulling me into a brief, tight embrace.
“Be careful, Bee. I’ll return as soon as I can.”
“I will. You too.”
With a final nod, he left for the palace. I turned back to the room, my resolve hardening.
El was out there, and I’d find her—no matter what it took.
