Chapter 4

Chapter 4

A moment later, Father came rushing in, out of breath.

‘Finally showing up, tsk.’

Father hurriedly knelt before the emperor’s messenger and bowed.

With practiced ease, the emperor’s messenger rose from his seat, straightened his clothes, and unrolled a scroll with a snap.

“Hanshin of the House of Yu, Left Vice Director of the Senior Second Rank, come forth at once and receive His Majesty’s command.”

Still bowing, Father rolled his eyes about quickly. He seemed to be racking his brain for the cause of whatever had happened.

So Father, too, couldn’t think of anything that might be amiss.

“The Left Vice Director shall give his legitimate eldest daughter, Yu Hwacheon, in marriage as the consort of Prince Hye, Ryu Hyeok.”

At those words, my head snapped up in shock. I could feel my pupils trembling.

Prince Hye, Ryu Hyeok.

There was no way I wouldn’t know that name. No, no one in the Nakbyeon Empire didn’t know that name. How could they not?

The pride of the imperial family who monopolized the emperor’s love, the future of the empire, the next Son of Heaven. He had countless epithets. I knew him well enough to have every one of them memorized.

And so I despaired.

‘No. This can’t be happening…!’

From the standpoint of my family, forming ties with the imperial house was a glory to boast of for generations, but I had no desire whatsoever to take part in that moment of glory.

Haven’t I said it before? I hate concubines. I hate them, truly, desperately.

I hated them enough to compose a song about how much I hated concubines, enough to rant about it for half a day.

And now I was to marry a man of the imperial house.

What good was it to hold the principal wife’s seat? Men of the imperial house who didn’t take concubines were exceedingly rare. Beyond rare, I doubted such a man had ever existed in history.

Just look at the emperor himself, the head of the imperial house. Hadn’t he kept dozens of consorts? I’d heard there were so many that there were consorts whose very existence the emperor wasn’t aware of.

That was what the men of the imperial house were: men who took in so many concubines that they piled them into mountain ranges.

‘And he isn’t just any man of the imperial house, but Prince Hye? Prince Hye? Ah, I really want to faint. On top of that, he’s the likely next emperor.’

The princes who were candidates for the next emperor took many concubines so as not to lose ground in the struggle for power. It was one of the easiest ways to solidify their authority.

So I, who hated concubines to death, was to be married off to a man who would take in a great many of them.

Had I spent my whole life going on and on about concubines, and was Heaven punishing me for it? Was it making a fool of me?

Born the legitimate daughter of a powerful house, I had always assumed I would marry into some extraordinary family. But I had never dreamed I would become the wife of the next emperor.

Apparently my father hadn’t dreamed of it either; he was staring at the messenger with an even dumber expression than mine.

When Father simply gazed blankly at the messenger’s face without answering that he would accept the command, the emperor’s messenger furrowed his brow. Only then did Father come to his senses and respond in a loud voice.

“I receive the command!”

It was my marriage, so why was Father the one accepting the command as he pleased? My wishes weren’t respected at all, and nobody was even curious about them.

I had heard here and there that imperial marriage proposals arrive without warning, but being handed the actual notice of my wedding was so absurd that tears welled up.

The tears were from not wanting to marry, but the emperor’s messenger seemed to mistake them for tears of joy, and wore a gratified look.

‘Don’t look so proud of yourself. I’m not happy right now. You’ve practically come here to ruin my life.’

Whether she knew how I felt or not, Mother also pulled me into her arms and made sobbing sounds.

“Hwacheon! How wonderful, how wonderful!”

Mother’s crying seemed to come from sheer happiness. What on earth was so wonderful? If she liked it that much, I wanted to hand her the seat of Princess Consort Hye.

Where no one could see, inside the folds of my skirt, I raised my middle finger.

Take that. Damn world, so you’ve finally come to torment me like this. Oh, to hell with it all.

* * *

“…Should I just run away?”

I’d thought about it, but I couldn’t do it, since I could plainly see what state I’d be in once I was caught.

Above all, I couldn’t bear to think of the trouble Mother would face after I ran. If Mother weren’t in this house, I would have tried running away.

Mother, beaming, shook me awake as I lay lifeless on the bed like a dead mouse.

Mother watched intently, at my side, as the servants washed my face, combed my hair, and dressed me in a process that left nothing to the imagination.

How long had it been since I’d seen Mother look at me with such affection? Was she really that happy about my marrying into the imperial family?

They say a daughter follows her mother’s fate, but I’d gone one better. Mother had lived her life tiptoeing around a single concubine, but I was about to spend mine tiptoeing around dozens.

My road ahead was paved with such misery, and I wanted to demand right then what on earth Mother was so happy about, but I didn’t want to waste my energy. Not that I had any energy left to waste.

“Hwacheon, you’re finally being a dutiful daughter to your mother.”

“Why make such a fuss about a marriage, calling it filial piety…?”

“What do you mean, a fuss? It’s a great deal! Oh, my pretty daughter. My future Empress.”

Hearing the title of Empress made my stomach churn, as if I might vomit onto the floor right then.

Whether I liked it or not, Mother didn’t even notice my rotten expression and kept chattering away.

“Girl, put those ornaments in carefully. She is to be Princess Consort Hye. If you scratch her by putting them in wrong, I will never forgive you.”

“Yes, madam.”

She, who had once even slapped my cheek, was now watching them pin my hair ornaments with anxious care.

I found the sight so absurd that a hollow laugh escaped me. Mother seemed to take my hollow laugh as an ordinary laugh, and asked brightly.

“Are you happy too? Hm? You’re so happy the laughter just comes out, isn’t it?”

“Ah, yes, yes…”

“Yes, you’re happy too. You couldn’t help but be. I was so lonely, since you were born a daughter and not a son, but perhaps you were born a woman just so that your mother could enjoy such luxury.”

After giving birth to me, Mother’s body had been badly damaged, and she was never able to have another child. So whenever she had a moment, she would mutter that it would have been good if I had been born a boy, since then I could have carried on the family line.

And in the midst of that, my father’s concubine gave birth to a plump, healthy son, a great celebration for the household.

When Mother heard that the concubine had borne a son, she looked at me and let out a long sigh. She must have felt very wronged that I hadn’t been born a boy.

I hadn’t particularly wanted to be born in a woman’s body either, but being treated that way made me resent being born a woman all the more.

If I had been a man, I might have been able to knock the concubine down a peg.

If I had been a man, Mother might have held her head higher than she did now.

If I had been a man, Father might have loved me even a little more.

But I wasn’t born a man, and that was a tragedy that could never be undone, no matter what.

Yet now that tragedy seemed to Mother like a comedy. Indeed, there’s no knowing which way a person’s fate will flow.

I wasn’t happy at all, but since Mother was so delighted, I didn’t want to spoil her mood. Better for Mother at least to be happy than for both of us to be miserable.

“Ah, that’s right.”

Mother bustled to her feet like someone who had just remembered something she’d forgotten.

I watched her with a gaze full of questions and asked gently.

“What is it?”

“I was supposed to bring rice cakes to the small house today, and I completely forgot. I’d better hurry over. Your father will be furious.”

I jumped up from my seat and cried out.

“Why should you go? Send a servant. Are you that house’s maid? Father alone being a servant to that house is bad enough, why should Mother act as a servant too?”

As if she were itching to play a servant, a role that had never been hers by fate, she was upsetting my stomach all over again.

“If I send a servant, it will look as though I haven’t put in enough effort. Once you enter the prince’s residence, there will be moments when you desperately need your father’s help. For that time, shouldn’t I make a better impression on him, even a little?”

“Ah, enough. If that’s the reason, just send me. I’ll go. You stay home, Mother.”

“Oh my, are you sure? You said you hated going to the small house. Has something changed in your heart? Is that it? Yes, make a firm impression on your father. Once you marry, you’ll have no one to lean on but your natal family.”

I simply couldn’t stand to see Mother setting out, cringing like that house’s servant. Nothing more, nothing less.

I didn’t care how Mother took my intention when I offered to go in her place.

Whether she mistook it for filial devotion or thought it a change of heart, that was her business. I didn’t want to explain my own feelings.

So I hurriedly picked up the basket of rice cakes.

If I gave her time to hesitate, Mother would surely reach out for it again, so I snatched up the basket without a word and headed straight for the gate.

In the end, Mother even brought out a silk wrapping cloth. She said that wrapping the basket would look nice, and seemed worried that someone might find fault. The sight weighed on my heart.

“Why go so far? Rice cakes are enough. There’s no need to wrap them in silk.”

Mother hesitated for a moment, then in the end did as I said. The silk cloth was quietly folded again and returned to its place.

If they wanted rice cakes, they should have left it to a rice mill. Why tell my mother to hand them over? Did they think I didn’t know their damned scheme?

You lot are all dead today.

* * *

Before I knew it, I had arrived at the front gate of the small house. Since it wasn’t my home, I knocked.

After a moment, a servant of the small house opened the gate and poked his head out to check my face.

“Oh my, Miss, you’ve come.”

The servant quickly flung the gate wide to welcome me. He had originally been a servant in our house, but Father had sent him over to the small house.

He was strong and quick-witted, and Mother had rather treasured him, but Father gave the best of everything to the concubine whether Mother treasured it or not.

When I stood in the courtyard holding the basket of rice cakes, my eyes met Father’s. He was on the veranda, massaging the concubine’s stockinged feet.

Father asked me with an indifferent face.

“…What are you doing here?”

Ever since I’d been chosen as Princess Consort Hye, Father had become oddly gentle toward me. I found that attitude of his terribly insincere.

What, was he afraid that I’d become Princess Consort Hye and take revenge on him?

“Mother told me to bring the rice cakes.”

“Why not send a servant for something like that? Why bother in person…?”

“I think so too. I didn’t come because I wanted to, so please stop pressing me.”

“You…!”

About to fly into a rage as usual, Father shut his mouth at whatever he read in my indifferent expression.

When I placed the basket of rice cakes in the concubine’s arms, she was overjoyed, her eyes curving into soft crescents.

“Oh my! It’s Elder Sister’s rice cakes!”

Honestly, the concubine really was a great beauty. With such a pretty face working its charms, what man wouldn’t fall?